Albert Pujols Sucks Forum

Discussion forum for Albert Pujols's anti-fans (L.A. Angels, MLB). Does he suck? Please do not post inappropriate comments, this is a friendly forum for fans. If you see inappropriate comments, then please report them by clicking the report abuse link aside the comment. Comments you post may require a paid membership to delete.

Anonymous (Sophomore) wrote on Sun, 20 May 2018 07:02:09 GMT reply
Why do the angels put up with this bum? He is terrible and his main contributions to the team are spraying green doo doo juice and leaving his gay porn magazines all over the clubhouse.
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Sun, 06 May 2018 20:12:52 GMT reply
What do you expect, when Albert looks like he is running barefoot over a field of grass. The guy can barely walk to the batters box from the dugout without it looking like he is stepping over hot coals.
I guess that's why Señor Automatico is the all time Major League leader in double plays. Yup, he has hit into more than anyone else in history by double digits and counting. Hell, by the time he's finished there's a good chance he will have hit into 75+ more double plays than than anyone else in history. At the rate he's going it's possible that it could get even worse than that. As bad as he is it is entirely possible that he'll retire having hit into 100+ more DP's than the next guy on the list.
Just think of the amount of runs Mike Trout would have scored over these past half dozen years if he had someone other than Señor Automatico hitting behind him?
I'm not sure why the Angels just don't make their guys running on the first pitch when Albert is at the plate (if there's less than 2 outs with runners on first, first and second, or first and third). Either that or Pujols should be made to sacrifice bunt in these situations, because he kills the team with his DP's.
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Sun, 06 May 2018 19:55:41 GMT reply
Albert 'Señor Automatico' Pujols. Important situation, runners on base with less than one out, you can count on Pujols to do one thing: hit into a double play. That's why he is affectionately known as Señor Automatico.
Anonymous (Sophomore) wrote on Sat, 05 May 2018 07:43:48 GMT reply
Albert got his 3000th hit today and then sprayed green diarrhea into Mike Trout's locker to celebrate!
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Sun, 22 Apr 2018 00:19:24 GMT reply
Pujols stinks. The other day I watched an angels game and saw him spraying green diarrhea into a bucket in the dugout. While doing this he was reading a gay porn magazine!
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Wed, 18 Apr 2018 12:33:07 GMT reply
pujols threw a tanturm during the red sox game april 17th he was ejected, and the angels put justin bieber at DH to replace him
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Wed, 18 Apr 2018 12:31:01 GMT reply
pujols can hit a real mean foul ball, but that dont help his ops
Anonymous (Sophomore) wrote on Wed, 18 Apr 2018 05:10:14 GMT reply
Today Albert was spotted farting on his hand and smelling it.
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Wed, 04 Apr 2018 11:43:01 GMT reply
the jap pitcher at DH can hit, Pujols on the other hand hits about as good as melissa etheridge these days, they both wish they has male genitalia
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Sun, 01 Apr 2018 00:42:51 GMT reply
Today Albert was spotted in the dugout watching Mama’s family on his phone and jerking off. He then strutted back to the clubhouse to overflow a toilet.
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Thu, 22 Mar 2018 09:52:44 GMT reply
Albert ate some bad Taco Bell yesterday and filled up the toilet at the Angel’s spring training facility with his trademark “green doo doo water.” He used so much toilet paper that the toilet clogged and then overflowed! I think this is a bad omen regarding his prospects for a comeback year in 2018...
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Tue, 20 Mar 2018 19:36:20 GMT reply
omg hawt hawt hawt! Do you think excrement can travel in time too?
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Tue, 20 Mar 2018 06:15:19 GMT reply
I would go back to the 2001 season when Mark McGwire mentored Albert during his rookie season. Big Mac helped Albert with his swing and introduced Albert to steroids. They also had some hot anal sex in the locker room after games while Jim Edmonds watched and pleasured qhimself!!
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Tue, 20 Mar 2018 05:37:44 GMT reply
I’d like to go back to this hot dumpster party back in 09 where Albert was sucking me off while getting buttslammed by a guy dressed as Mr. Belvedere!
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Sun, 18 Mar 2018 09:21:55 GMT reply
If anyone had a time machine, what year would you go back to and why? I think Pujols would definitely want to go back to the 2005 season!
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Sat, 17 Mar 2018 00:09:22 GMT reply
I was that little kid and my name is Timmy you damn faggot. I asked him to shit on me as my dream was to have my idol and favorite ball player release his stinky bowels in my face. He is my hero!
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Thu, 15 Mar 2018 03:35:56 GMT reply
I was at spring training today. A little kid holding a ball asked Pujols to sign it. Pujols laughed, turned around, dropped his pants, and shit on the kid. What a memory that kid will have!
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Wed, 28 Feb 2018 07:33:23 GMT reply
Albert spent much of the winter holed up with his lover Michael “Problem Child” Oliver. They lived in a dumpster together in the Bay Area and had tons of hot man action. Albert has learned to love eating garbage as much as he enjoys eating ass. He has committed himself to watching as much gay porn in the dugout this season as he has fully committed himself to a hardcore queer lifestyle. He has also begun wearing a diaper.
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Sat, 11 Nov 2017 14:04:26 GMT reply
Jose... Ventura... Roy... Who’s Next?
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Sat, 11 Nov 2017 13:59:49 GMT reply
We miss you... Al’boats’ Pujols.. R.I.P
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Sat, 11 Nov 2017 04:31:28 GMT reply
Does anyone know if Albert is working as a mail prostitute this offseason? I heard he is doing so to make a little extra cash and I’d like to give him a nice rusty trombone as well as crisp $20!
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Tue, 19 Sep 2017 04:53:12 GMT reply
NOT AS BAD AS MIKE TROUT BUT HE STILL SUCLS. STICK TO TABLE TENNIS!
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Mon, 11 Sep 2017 09:41:11 GMT reply
Albert has been hitting much better lately and his batting average is up to .248, which still sucks, although it is better than the .220s he was at recently. I would love to give him some rough anal sex to reward him, just the way he likes it! I'll pound his anus while he pleasures himself!
Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Sat, 26 Aug 2017 08:03:58 GMT reply
Albert Pujols would be better at baseball if he wasn't so fat. Does he know cardio exists? He is stealing enough money from the Angels and Mike Trout's prime that he can afford a personal chef to keep him on a decent diet
Anonymous (Sophomore) wrote on Sun, 13 Aug 2017 07:59:16 GMT reply
Rook, Pujols is terrible now and it seems inevitable that he'll be released before playing out his full contract. I suspect he stopped taking steroids or HGH after joining the Angels, which would explain why his skills deteriorated so rapidly. It's hard to comprehend just how good he was until his last season in St. Louis, when his stats started dropping.
.
Even though he sucks now, I'd still like to watch him have full man-on-man sex with Mike Trout - I bet Albert would enjoy eating Mike's stinky diarrhea butthole!
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