Discussion forum for Anthony Rizzo's anti-fans
(Chi. Cubs, MLB).
Does he suck?
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I have solid info that Anthony has ballooned to over 300 pounds and can barely swing a bat. He swears this extra weight increases the potency of his pepperoni farts which is the only thing he's concerned about.
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I met Anthony on a nude cruise cruise out of Navy Pier last summer. Anthony wore his Cubs hat and nothing else. He was so nice - he had the event catered with deep dish pepperoni pizzas from Lou Malnatti's! He also provided about 50 2-liters of Mountain Dew and Pepsi for the guests and staff. An hour into the cruise the dance floor was kicking! The Macarena song started played and Anthony got really into it and ripped a ridiculously loud and smelly wet fart while dancing which coated the floor with his shit juice. A little twink slipped on the juice and sprained his ankle. Anthony walked over to the young man, asked how he was, and before the man could answer, Anthony pressed his bare ass again the twink's face and ripped another wet fart to teach him a lesson! A lot of gay Cubs fans then started having sex on the dance floor. By the end of the cruise, the dance floor was coated in a layer of shit, semen, and piss! It was so homo-erotic!!!
Kris Bryant got married to a woman this past weekend. Is Kris Bryant going to continue hooking up with Anthony for sweaty unprotected butt sex? If not, Anthony is going to need to find a new gay lover. I personally think that Anthony and Alex Rodriguez would make a cute couple! I bet that they would '69 each other several times a day!!!
I was at a gay bar called the "Torn Anus" yesterday and they had little bowls of Pepperoni Fart flavored Rizzo-O's on the bar! I took a handful into the men's room and ate them while some random dude sucked me off
I was at a Jewel grocery store today on the North Side and I saw a display of Rizzo-O's. I was excited and nearly creamed my pants when I saw a new flavor - "Pepperoni Fart" flavored!!! The cereal company is going to make so me much money off this new flavor!!!
I heard that Anthony has gained 25 lbs from all of the deep dish pepperoni pizzas he has been eating during the past couple months! GM Theo Epstein has ordered him stop eating pizza, although he is allowed to "eat" wet pepperoni farts!
Rook your nonsensical post below has highly aroused me! I'd like to give you a nice pair of Arabian goggles followed by a nice tea baggage. You can then tongue my filthy anus while I jerk off in your eye! Let me know when we can make this dream a reality!
Rookie, your rant about cyber stalking us turning me on! Let's have sex soon. I will go diarrhea into your mouth and then you can toss my salad until my anus is squeaky clean! After that we can have protected butt sex so I can fill you with my seed. You must be so turned on reading about this tremendous opportunity - let's hook up soon!!!
I wonder if Anthony will weigh over 300 pounds by Spring training? It would be cool if they let him eat pizza in the dugout so he could rip heinous pepperoni farts. If they allow this I bet this will whip his teammates into a sexual frenzy and the dugout will stink like ass and be full of dudes jerking off!
There are a few new culprits on this forum & I have a very strong suspicion as to their public identities. Wouldn't be a good look to admit that this is the activity that you commit your time between your full time job of being a certified sociopath. Careful. Cyber stalking is a legitimate offense.
I was in town for Anthony's fiesta and it was definitely a good time. I did see Heyward later on in the evening at a dumpster behind a Taco Bell. He belched in my face while I was buttslamming a dude dressed as Mike Piazza.
Hey vet, that sounds erotic, but did you not go to the YMCA centre opposite the 'cockpit' bar you were in at Boystown? There was a no holds barred 'Dawson's Creek' and 'Teen Angel' themed party starring Pujols, Heyward and Mike Napoli! This was where Rizzo and A Rod went for the pre party accompanied by some feral males!
I was at the hottest party ever tonight! I was at a gay bar in Boystown which is in downtown Chicago. I knew Anthony Rizzo would be there but A Rod was also there! Anthony started the night off right by letting loose many of his patented pepperoni farts which really got the crowd going. I saw A Rod and Anthony making out for awhile and A Rod grabbed his ass. I think Anthony farted on his hand as A Rod then put his hand to his nose and breathed deeply. He then had a look of ecstasy on his face! During the countdown to the new year A Rod got up on a ilittle stage and dropped his pants. He then aimed his ass at the cheering crowd. At the stroke of midnight A Rod's butthole let loose an amazing torrent of diarrhea! At the same time Anthony Rizzo rung in the new year by releasing a ridiculously loud pepperoni fart! The place stank like ass and that's when the hot man action really kicked off. I just got home and just had to file this report before going to bed. What a night!
My wife and I partied in the New Year at Joe's in Lincoln Park on Saturday night. There was an 80s cover band which rocked. However, there were also a bunch of queers there. I smelled two ripe farts throughout the night, which were obviously expelled by gay guys trying to attract other guys for anal sex. I also saw a couple queers making out, which was nasty. If Anthony had been there, he would have cleared the room with one of his trademark pepperoni farts!!!