Darcy Vaillancourt

Sat, 14 Nov 2009 01:05:36 GMT

it's not what I want to do..and I hate to say it is easier...but it is. I know, that if things could happen between us, it would be the most amazing thing to ever happen to me ever. but to get to that point..i don't know i just don't know I want you to tell me it's okay that you want to talk to me that you don't hate me that you want to see me but you 'll never do it so I'll just keep thinkin on cok

Darcy Vaillancourt

Sat, 14 Nov 2009 01:03:40 GMT

i think i convinced myself that I am straight. so you might imagine how i feel now. so I think about wcok all of the time....and I haven't seen you in 5 years....soooo......what am i going to do next...?

Darcy Vaillancourt

Sat, 14 Nov 2009 00:34:28 GMT

I am not sure what I am supposed to do now. I don't know why I believe people like Madhu and James, but from what they said, it's not a good idea to try to see you. And I don't know if I was supposed to take the cops seriously, but I did and it has ruined me. It's just that..I know I don't deserve you. I don't even know what I could say to you. I am so sad that I can't see you. and I am so afraid , but also I don't even have time to stalk and or knock on your door. I am so unhappy and the longer I don't see you the ughhhh god I don't even like to think about how long it's been. i'm going to see Ani tomorrow night and it would just be too groovey if I saw you too.

Darcy Vaillancourt

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 14:58:20 GMT

i'm going to take my time figuring out my next dwelling area...but providence sounds fun for a change.

Darcy Vaillancourt

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 01:55:23 GMT

raging hard huh???!!!!

Darcy Vaillancourt

Sat, 07 Nov 2009 00:36:52 GMT

i thought it was in my car so i looked the other day and couldn't find it!

Darcy Vaillancourt

Sat, 07 Nov 2009 00:36:15 GMT

damn i totally lost that picture i stole of you at gis day. that sucks it was the closest thing to real i've seen in years.

Darcy Vaillancourt

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 01:50:45 GMT

i like being alive i just can't deal with reality so well it's not so good.

Darcy Vaillancourt

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 23:46:22 GMT

and the worst part about the whole day is that dominion people probably thought i came out of my office only to watch someone walk down the hall but it was a weird coincidence because i was checking for someonething else...it may have looked like i was trying to check someone out pathetically but i just thought something else was happening ......i am really not good at this living thing

Darcy Vaillancourt

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 23:43:46 GMT

i am done being myself at work. i am done with the talking in genereal. i almost walked out today. maybe it's not meant to be i can't tell if it's me

Darcy Vaillancourt

Sun, 01 Nov 2009 12:49:52 GMT

oops profound

Darcy Vaillancourt

Sun, 01 Nov 2009 12:49:12 GMT

not profount or serious!!!! hahaha yeah you're absolutly correct

Darcy Vaillancourt

Wed, 28 Oct 2009 14:26:06 GMT

i don't want to spend another cold winter alone. i'm sick of it....i'm lonely!!!

Darcy Vaillancourt

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 13:00:35 GMT

I am so scared to be rejected by you , i'm afraid if i try to talk to you that will be it...the real end. I don't want a real end to happen!! so could that be why I can't get up the courage.....it's sad ....it's sad that you won't prompt me...that you can't just tell me you want to see me. it's sad because .....it's all I want ...but I can't figure out a way.

Darcy Vaillancourt

Fri, 23 Oct 2009 19:21:32 GMT

i have no idea what you look like anymore and ....i bet the years have treated you well

Darcy Vaillancourt

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 21:12:48 GMT

i was thinking maybe i could go to that geography speech that guy Harm is doing tomorrow night......but i'm sure you won't be there so whatever maybe i won't go.

Darcy Vaillancourt

Wed, 14 Oct 2009 22:51:21 GMT

i don't even know how you could ever expect me to go to you, to see you. i'm sure you understand the kind of hell i've been living ever since that sht went down . and everytime i would gain some hope, become a little less depressed, you'd shoot me down again. do you know where you left me? ... you gave me nothing.....no response....nothing good. and each time you gave me nothing, i lost more hope, i got deeper into effed upness. so now i am leading a semi normal life. only depressed sometimes....so why would i ....why...would i think that you would give me something rather than nothing? how can i think that and how can i put myself out there, how can i make myself such a target for defeat again.

the thought of you and me seems quite impossible right about now. it has....not just now...for a long time. and i bet you wouldn't believe what i think about. i think about having a husband and kids and a normal life. the way i've been wrapped up in you has only made me depressed and unhealthy. i just want to be happy and fcked. how can i believe that you're not just going to be a kunt to me. ? because if that happened...i don't know what i'd do with myself. i know, i'd be at square one again. crying every day for 2 years.

Darcy Vaillancourt

Tue, 13 Oct 2009 19:17:27 GMT

maybe i am happy at work...but the second i get alone...i just want to cry i think i am seriously depressed because all i want to do is see you but i am not convinced you want that and you obviously don't care at all or else you would make it convincing

Darcy Vaillancourt

Tue, 13 Oct 2009 19:15:40 GMT

some days are tougher than others....but recently i miss you so much....i am so depressed i just go straight home after work and put music on and lay around. i don't want to do anything.....i cooked a lot when i wasn't working...but now i just get home and i don't want to move. i just want to lay and dream about you

Darcy Vaillancourt

Mon, 12 Oct 2009 23:42:41 GMT

i miss you like you have no idea

Darcy Vaillancourt

Sun, 11 Oct 2009 23:23:11 GMT

ouch!

Darcy Vaillancourt

Sun, 11 Oct 2009 23:22:41 GMT

You sometimes use capaz in this structure to suggest that you can’t trust or rely on someone: see below

Darcy Vaillancourt

Sat, 10 Oct 2009 16:46:19 GMT

my hair is pink.

Darcy Vaillancourt

Fri, 02 Oct 2009 17:38:05 GMT

maybe i'll be around the college tomorrow because i have to bring an old friend home to whitman...

Darcy Vaillancourt

Thu, 01 Oct 2009 18:36:08 GMT

how am i supposed to find you if i work far away and work everyday till 6.....how how how how i've been feeling like i really want to see you.....i just feel like crying all of the time...mostly when i'm getting in bed ....it just seeems so impossible for me to ever see you again....it's sad it makes me sad.